i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
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