i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize