it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
