I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
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