the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
