Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
