look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize