my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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