I just made out with a guy for $7.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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