David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
