Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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