Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
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