If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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