They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
