i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
