Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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