The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
