You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
