does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
