At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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