Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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