just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
