If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
