I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize