the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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