everyone is single if you try hard enough
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
we should paint friendship bongs
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