What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
