i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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