woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
