no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
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