Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Randomize
