sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
