dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize