His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
