Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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