so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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