He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Randomize
