so that wasnt chicken after all
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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