Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
