only if we run a train.
done.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
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