Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize