i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize