I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize