is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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