And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
this hospital has no fireball
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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