there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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