I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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