I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
