I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
