How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Randomize
